Tretakoff Musings
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Right Place, Right Time, Right Precedent
There are certain historical moments that, in retrospect, could have only happened with the unique combination of circumstances, individuals, and timing. The saying "Only Nixon could have gone to China" exemplifies this: only a man who had been so rabidly anti-Communist could have been the one to reach out to the leader of the most populous Communist nation on Earth, at the time that war raged through proxies of each, to usher in a new détente. Only Lincoln could have ended slavery, and endured a civil war as a result. And only FDR could have led this nation back from the Great Depression with unprecedented powers we would have entrusted to no one else.
FDR's situation is particularly poignant today. He was a little-known politician, most famous for being a cousin of a former president. He was a member of a minority, being handicapped. He ran for office, promising change, in the worst economic time in the country's history. In fact, the country was so desperate for change, having endured 8 years of agony, that alone brought this unlikely leader into office on a new wave of optimism. Sound at all familiar?
FDR, like our newly elected President, faced a grave financial situation. With the nation's economy in free fall, and shrinking tax revenue to use to drive new initiatives, he was forced to look at new ways to address the problem. The question remained: how to get new tax revenue without putting an undue burden on an already suffering people? There was an easy solution: end Prohibition.
People clearly were already spending their money on this inexpensive release valve, and they were paying higher prices because of the illegality; the government was spending millions of dollars to police and enforce this, all for nothing. And alcohol had already been legal, and the world had not ended. By ending Prohibition, FDR would save the government money, reward the taxpayer with inexpensive access to a recreational mechanism that would help ease their pain, and would generate new tax income. In 1933, in his first year in office, FDR did just that. Unsurprisingly, this act succeeded in helping to lead the country out of the Depression, established Social Security, and, combined with a new spirit of contribution, arguably made the single biggest impact on the building of the true United States.
So, President Obama comes into office, faced with remarkably similar circumstances as FDR. Well, Mr. Obama, there is a simple solution for you, too, and best of all, it's already been proven successful by one of the greatest presidents ever: repeal the ban on marijuana.
Let me make my position clear. I do not smoke or use marijuana in any way. This is not out of some prurient interest; I simply am not fond of the effects, and I prefer to not inhale smoke (I stick to cigars for that reason). This is not to say that I have never done so; I certainly have, and quite extensively, though it has been more than 2 decades since I last did so. I am also absolutely not against anyone being denied their right to smoke pot: study after study has shown that it's effects are far better than our nation's drug of choice, alcohol, and it's far less addictive. It has positive medical uses, it's easier to consume, and it has far less long-term health impacts. And the hemp plant (a derivation) is incredibly robust: it can be used for clothing, building materials...it's the ultimate "green" substance, in a time we are trying to wean ourselves off of industrialism.
Repealing the ban on marijuana consumption would:
California's broke (the world's 8th largest economy); we've got massive layoffs in a sector that traditionally employs a far more educated consumer (tech) who would prefer pot over beer; and we are in a state that already is perceived by the world as wackos. We have medical marijuana laws on the books, and the north part of the state is one of the largest illegal suppliers of pot to the world today. Why not capitalize on all of that, and allow a governor who is barred by US law from serving in a higher office to take the risk as a pilot? As President, Obama would only have to agree to allow the experiment, not take the actions himself, but if it succeeds, he could take the credit. And Schwarzenegger? He's an actor; he'll play his part as the great outsider, as long as it gets him re-elected.
There are, of course, some thorny issues to resolve. How would production and distribution be set up? What happens to those in prison for marijuana offenses today? If it is California who takes the first step, how do we treat visitors from other states? But those are all issues we can resolve, and quickly. The sheer act of stopping enforcement will free up so much budget money that Californians can have their state fund for unemployment, emergency medical treatment, and eduction; the tax revenue it generates will help create jobs, repair critical infrastructure, and encourage new investment.
A few short days ago, this country celebrated a milestone, ushering in a President like no other in history to office on a wave of enthusisasm and faith not seen since JFK. Only Nixon could go to China, and only BHO could bring the THC.
FDR's situation is particularly poignant today. He was a little-known politician, most famous for being a cousin of a former president. He was a member of a minority, being handicapped. He ran for office, promising change, in the worst economic time in the country's history. In fact, the country was so desperate for change, having endured 8 years of agony, that alone brought this unlikely leader into office on a new wave of optimism. Sound at all familiar?FDR, like our newly elected President, faced a grave financial situation. With the nation's economy in free fall, and shrinking tax revenue to use to drive new initiatives, he was forced to look at new ways to address the problem. The question remained: how to get new tax revenue without putting an undue burden on an already suffering people? There was an easy solution: end Prohibition.
People clearly were already spending their money on this inexpensive release valve, and they were paying higher prices because of the illegality; the government was spending millions of dollars to police and enforce this, all for nothing. And alcohol had already been legal, and the world had not ended. By ending Prohibition, FDR would save the government money, reward the taxpayer with inexpensive access to a recreational mechanism that would help ease their pain, and would generate new tax income. In 1933, in his first year in office, FDR did just that. Unsurprisingly, this act succeeded in helping to lead the country out of the Depression, established Social Security, and, combined with a new spirit of contribution, arguably made the single biggest impact on the building of the true United States.
So, President Obama comes into office, faced with remarkably similar circumstances as FDR. Well, Mr. Obama, there is a simple solution for you, too, and best of all, it's already been proven successful by one of the greatest presidents ever: repeal the ban on marijuana.
Let me make my position clear. I do not smoke or use marijuana in any way. This is not out of some prurient interest; I simply am not fond of the effects, and I prefer to not inhale smoke (I stick to cigars for that reason). This is not to say that I have never done so; I certainly have, and quite extensively, though it has been more than 2 decades since I last did so. I am also absolutely not against anyone being denied their right to smoke pot: study after study has shown that it's effects are far better than our nation's drug of choice, alcohol, and it's far less addictive. It has positive medical uses, it's easier to consume, and it has far less long-term health impacts. And the hemp plant (a derivation) is incredibly robust: it can be used for clothing, building materials...it's the ultimate "green" substance, in a time we are trying to wean ourselves off of industrialism.Repealing the ban on marijuana consumption would:
- Generate much needed tax revenue for an administration who needs it to help our economy transition to a new skill set
- Allow people who are paying, illegally, high prices to consume an extremely inexpensive resource, generating more capital for them to spend in the economy
- Create "green" jobs, as industries race to embrace the farming mechanisms needed to produce this on a consistent quality level
- End the billions of dollars being spent to police, jail, and fruitlessly pursue the current purveyors and consumers.
- Allow the suffering American a new way to ease the pain of living in such lean economic times at an inexpensive price.
California's broke (the world's 8th largest economy); we've got massive layoffs in a sector that traditionally employs a far more educated consumer (tech) who would prefer pot over beer; and we are in a state that already is perceived by the world as wackos. We have medical marijuana laws on the books, and the north part of the state is one of the largest illegal suppliers of pot to the world today. Why not capitalize on all of that, and allow a governor who is barred by US law from serving in a higher office to take the risk as a pilot? As President, Obama would only have to agree to allow the experiment, not take the actions himself, but if it succeeds, he could take the credit. And Schwarzenegger? He's an actor; he'll play his part as the great outsider, as long as it gets him re-elected.There are, of course, some thorny issues to resolve. How would production and distribution be set up? What happens to those in prison for marijuana offenses today? If it is California who takes the first step, how do we treat visitors from other states? But those are all issues we can resolve, and quickly. The sheer act of stopping enforcement will free up so much budget money that Californians can have their state fund for unemployment, emergency medical treatment, and eduction; the tax revenue it generates will help create jobs, repair critical infrastructure, and encourage new investment.
A few short days ago, this country celebrated a milestone, ushering in a President like no other in history to office on a wave of enthusisasm and faith not seen since JFK. Only Nixon could go to China, and only BHO could bring the THC.
Saturday, January 17, 2009
PETA: Now Even MORE Misguided
15 years ago, the Patagonia Toothfish was, to say the least, not much of a hot seller. Then, some ingenious marketers thought of renaming the fish with a name that would be more tempting to diners, and the Chilean Sea Bass was born, becoming so successful, the sales of it have to be now restricted to ensure we don't fish the species out of existence. A great example of marketing in the world of seafood, one that brought great prosperity and expanded palates.
Today, we have an absolutely opposite inanity, courtesy of the lunatics at the oh so benignly named People For The Ethical Treatment of Animals, or PETA. They have announced a PR campaign to rebrand fish as...sea kittens. Yes, these crazy folks, who would rather let humans die of starvation, malnutrition, and agony, believe that the latest "animals" to need their protection are fish. This is misguided in so many ways, it dazzles the mind.
These zealots are masters of the language war, having executed successful campaigns on fur, supermarkets...the list goes on. Their name is the real master stroke: their agenda is not to more humanely treat animals, but to prevent them from any human contact at all. But in this latest effort, they have erred: they have clearly seen the success of rebranding in the seafood world, and are trying to capitalize on it, but they have missed the point: it was only a success because commercial enterprises embraced it for their own self-interests. Who in their right mind is going to willingly label their product as "sea kittens?"
The insanity is clearly pervasive throughout these people who have clearly been so hurt by humanity to such a degree that they would rather transfer their compassion to a more accepting group. Frankly, I'm not a huge fan of animals, but I do see the love they inspire, but stacked against the heart-rending knowledge of children in a 3rd world country who will starve without needed food, or go malnourished...or even knowing that their asinine efforts in the US cause basics foods like eggs to skyrocket in price, impacting the poorest of our nation...well, I don't think it's even close.
These people are ill. Says Ashley Byrne, PETA's sea kitten campaign co-ordinator"Knowing that the fish sticks in the school cafeteria are really made out of tortured sea kittens makes most kids want to lose their lunch." Ashley, I have to ask: what actual institution that professes to educate children would ever use your bizarre talking points? And if neither they, nor the companies that produce these nutritional necessities for children, are considering anything to do with you, why in the world do you think this makes sense?
Look, PETA: if you want to take on folks who abuse puppies, or the disaster of not spaying cats so that they are forced to die from starvation, I'm actaully right there with you. But leave the human foodstuffs alone: we are an omnivorous species, and you have the right to be a vegetarian; I have the right to eat my fish. Now excuse me, I have a special Sea Kitten Roll waiting for me at the sushi bar.
Today, we have an absolutely opposite inanity, courtesy of the lunatics at the oh so benignly named People For The Ethical Treatment of Animals, or PETA. They have announced a PR campaign to rebrand fish as...sea kittens. Yes, these crazy folks, who would rather let humans die of starvation, malnutrition, and agony, believe that the latest "animals" to need their protection are fish. This is misguided in so many ways, it dazzles the mind.These zealots are masters of the language war, having executed successful campaigns on fur, supermarkets...the list goes on. Their name is the real master stroke: their agenda is not to more humanely treat animals, but to prevent them from any human contact at all. But in this latest effort, they have erred: they have clearly seen the success of rebranding in the seafood world, and are trying to capitalize on it, but they have missed the point: it was only a success because commercial enterprises embraced it for their own self-interests. Who in their right mind is going to willingly label their product as "sea kittens?"
The insanity is clearly pervasive throughout these people who have clearly been so hurt by humanity to such a degree that they would rather transfer their compassion to a more accepting group. Frankly, I'm not a huge fan of animals, but I do see the love they inspire, but stacked against the heart-rending knowledge of children in a 3rd world country who will starve without needed food, or go malnourished...or even knowing that their asinine efforts in the US cause basics foods like eggs to skyrocket in price, impacting the poorest of our nation...well, I don't think it's even close.These people are ill. Says Ashley Byrne, PETA's sea kitten campaign co-ordinator"Knowing that the fish sticks in the school cafeteria are really made out of tortured sea kittens makes most kids want to lose their lunch." Ashley, I have to ask: what actual institution that professes to educate children would ever use your bizarre talking points? And if neither they, nor the companies that produce these nutritional necessities for children, are considering anything to do with you, why in the world do you think this makes sense?
Look, PETA: if you want to take on folks who abuse puppies, or the disaster of not spaying cats so that they are forced to die from starvation, I'm actaully right there with you. But leave the human foodstuffs alone: we are an omnivorous species, and you have the right to be a vegetarian; I have the right to eat my fish. Now excuse me, I have a special Sea Kitten Roll waiting for me at the sushi bar.
Monday, October 27, 2008
Sharing is NOT Social Networking
An article in today's Boston Globe caught my eye: Barnes & Noble announced they would launch a site for customers to track their interests and favorite authors, and "share information with Facebook and other social networks." The headline of said article? "Barnes & Noble goes social networking."
Intrigued, as the article was picked up by a few retail-centric newsletters I read, I signed up. The results were disappointing, to say the least: it's not much more than a "build my library" feature. The "social networking?" It consists of a "Share" button that allows you to post an article to Digg or Facebook. You're kidding, right? That's not social networking; that's ShareThis, the same type of widget I put on the end of my posts to allow you to share my thoughts with others.
To be fair, I don't put the blame on this embarrassment on B&N; I put this squarely at the feet of the AP reporter, who's lead in the article started with "Barnes & Noble is playing the social network game." That's just poor reporting; my guess is the reporter simply read the press release, and rather than check out the site and report on it, they simply went with a hot lead. Of course, I could be completely wrong: the "social networking" features of My BN may be so hard to find that they were not apparent to me after 10 minutes, in which case they deserve the blame.
In any case, someone deserves to be called out for this, so consider yourself called out. Don't dress an elephant in pink chiffon and call it a ballerina; many retailers are using social networking in an interesting and creative way. This is hardly worthy of the title.
An article in today's Boston Globe caught my eye: Barnes & Noble announced they would launch a site for customers to track their interests and favorite authors, and "share information with Facebook and other social networks." The headline of said article? "Barnes & Noble goes social networking."Intrigued, as the article was picked up by a few retail-centric newsletters I read, I signed up. The results were disappointing, to say the least: it's not much more than a "build my library" feature. The "social networking?" It consists of a "Share" button that allows you to post an article to Digg or Facebook. You're kidding, right? That's not social networking; that's ShareThis, the same type of widget I put on the end of my posts to allow you to share my thoughts with others.
To be fair, I don't put the blame on this embarrassment on B&N; I put this squarely at the feet of the AP reporter, who's lead in the article started with "Barnes & Noble is playing the social network game." That's just poor reporting; my guess is the reporter simply read the press release, and rather than check out the site and report on it, they simply went with a hot lead. Of course, I could be completely wrong: the "social networking" features of My BN may be so hard to find that they were not apparent to me after 10 minutes, in which case they deserve the blame.
In any case, someone deserves to be called out for this, so consider yourself called out. Don't dress an elephant in pink chiffon and call it a ballerina; many retailers are using social networking in an interesting and creative way. This is hardly worthy of the title.
Labels: bullshit, business, social networks
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
How NOT To Do E-mail Marketing #147
In my business, I tend to work with a lot of online marketers. I also tend to work with a lot of companies who look at loyal customers, and focus on ways to keep them loyal. So, when I come across a particular example in my personal life of one that does both so badly, I have to point it out.
Today's example is a company called Haggar. I know, you're thinking "the people that make those expandable slacks my grandfather wore?" Yes, them. About 10 years ago, they invested heavily in a new brand image: hipper, cheaper, and good quality. They opened a ton of factory outlet stores, while bringing the new lines into retailers like Mervyn's, JC Penney, etc. And thus the modern Haggar was born: a mix of casual clothes and traditional suits at extremely low prices, with modern styling.
5 or 6 years ago, I used to commute 120 miles each way to work. I know, sounds insane, but I loved the company, and the commute started in Marin County, CA, and ended in Monterey, CA: now, if you have to commute, that's the route to do it. Midway was one of the largest outlet malls in Northern California; I'd stop off occasionally to get a burger, coffee, or pick something up. There, I discovered the new Haggar, with their $5 silk shirts and $10 khakis, it was always easy to pop in. They expanded into designs emulating Tommy Bahama, etc., and I was really hooked. Later, my devotion to them extended to their Petaluma store, after I stopped commuting down South, and I routinely stopped in to part with my cash for their products. They had me on the mailing list, even did special orders, and more. Heck, the Petaluma store people knew my name and by sight!
So, we have a loyal customer, who spends lots of money with you, and has even provided specific marketing information about themselves. How do you communicate with them? I guess, if you are Haggar, like this:
Ok, first, I understand locations close. Hey, my business was not enough to keep them going. Here's why this was such an egregious example of poor e-mail marketing:
- Why is this the first message I received about that location? Why not tell me before hand, maybe offering me incentives to visit for "closeout" pricing? A completely perfect revenue generating opportunity wasted: you're telling me they preferred to pack and ship the merchandise out of that location, rather than discount it and sell it to me? C'mon.
- They clearly know I like that location; they sent me this e-mail, after all. But you are telling me they can't offer me a list of other nearby locations in the e-mail? Instead, I have to visit the site? Ok, I can accept that's a clever way to get me to interact with the site and potentially buy something...if they had e-commerce.
- On that same note, the link to the site to find other nearby locations links only to the homepage. Instead of delivering me to a store locator, I have to crawl around your bad site to find one of the worst locators ever: lists all locations in CA, including department stores, only to find the one outlet? Ugh.
- This e-mail was literally this HUGE image. Nothing else. This is the way you want to convey bad news? Not with an incentive to visit the other location, or maybe some text to soften the news? Nope, that's how they roll.
Loyalty and E-mail marketers out there, beware...
Today's example is a company called Haggar. I know, you're thinking "the people that make those expandable slacks my grandfather wore?" Yes, them. About 10 years ago, they invested heavily in a new brand image: hipper, cheaper, and good quality. They opened a ton of factory outlet stores, while bringing the new lines into retailers like Mervyn's, JC Penney, etc. And thus the modern Haggar was born: a mix of casual clothes and traditional suits at extremely low prices, with modern styling.
5 or 6 years ago, I used to commute 120 miles each way to work. I know, sounds insane, but I loved the company, and the commute started in Marin County, CA, and ended in Monterey, CA: now, if you have to commute, that's the route to do it. Midway was one of the largest outlet malls in Northern California; I'd stop off occasionally to get a burger, coffee, or pick something up. There, I discovered the new Haggar, with their $5 silk shirts and $10 khakis, it was always easy to pop in. They expanded into designs emulating Tommy Bahama, etc., and I was really hooked. Later, my devotion to them extended to their Petaluma store, after I stopped commuting down South, and I routinely stopped in to part with my cash for their products. They had me on the mailing list, even did special orders, and more. Heck, the Petaluma store people knew my name and by sight!
So, we have a loyal customer, who spends lots of money with you, and has even provided specific marketing information about themselves. How do you communicate with them? I guess, if you are Haggar, like this:
Ok, first, I understand locations close. Hey, my business was not enough to keep them going. Here's why this was such an egregious example of poor e-mail marketing:
- Why is this the first message I received about that location? Why not tell me before hand, maybe offering me incentives to visit for "closeout" pricing? A completely perfect revenue generating opportunity wasted: you're telling me they preferred to pack and ship the merchandise out of that location, rather than discount it and sell it to me? C'mon.
- They clearly know I like that location; they sent me this e-mail, after all. But you are telling me they can't offer me a list of other nearby locations in the e-mail? Instead, I have to visit the site? Ok, I can accept that's a clever way to get me to interact with the site and potentially buy something...if they had e-commerce.
- On that same note, the link to the site to find other nearby locations links only to the homepage. Instead of delivering me to a store locator, I have to crawl around your bad site to find one of the worst locators ever: lists all locations in CA, including department stores, only to find the one outlet? Ugh.
- This e-mail was literally this HUGE image. Nothing else. This is the way you want to convey bad news? Not with an incentive to visit the other location, or maybe some text to soften the news? Nope, that's how they roll.
Loyalty and E-mail marketers out there, beware...
Labels: bullshit, business, Loyalty Lab
Thursday, May 01, 2008
Bait & Switch In the Online Age
Unacceptable e-mail from TigerDirect.com today.
Subject line: $299 Laptop...22" LCD $199...37" HDTV $599
Of course a $299 laptop is appealing to me! When you open the e-mail, this is what you get:
This may work in 42nd St. in NYC, but not on the web. Guess Tiger won't be getting my business.
Subject line: $299 Laptop...22" LCD $199...37" HDTV $599
Of course a $299 laptop is appealing to me! When you open the e-mail, this is what you get:
This may work in 42nd St. in NYC, but not on the web. Guess Tiger won't be getting my business.
Monday, April 21, 2008
Frakking Bastards
Comcast adding SciFi to their HD lineup: good. Ability to watch the last season of Battlestar Galactica in HD: great. Comcast compressing the HD signal to the point of my DVR acting like it's had too much caffeine in trying to keep up with the compressed signal: Bad. Comcast once again admitting that they throttle bandwidth, but refusing to tell anyone why or under what standards they apply it to: Horrific.
You'd think they would learn, as they are facing $100 million in fines from the FCC on their broadband throttling. But messing with people's HDTV? I can see a big boost for Verizon, AT&T, and DirecTV...
Comcast adding SciFi to their HD lineup: good. Ability to watch the last season of Battlestar Galactica in HD: great. Comcast compressing the HD signal to the point of my DVR acting like it's had too much caffeine in trying to keep up with the compressed signal: Bad. Comcast once again admitting that they throttle bandwidth, but refusing to tell anyone why or under what standards they apply it to: Horrific.You'd think they would learn, as they are facing $100 million in fines from the FCC on their broadband throttling. But messing with people's HDTV? I can see a big boost for Verizon, AT&T, and DirecTV...
Saturday, February 09, 2008
Paper: The Hobgoblin of Analog Minds
I have an admission: I hate paper. From printouts of emails, to handwritten notes, I detest paper in almost all forms. It has become the trash and detritus of our daily life: credit/debit cards have nearly replaced paper money, but they leave behind the droppings of indecipherable receipts that we, as a society, are terrified to leave behind for fear that our entire identity will be stolen from that innocuous pizza payment. As we have moved to a digital world, complete with multifunction scanner/printers and both enormous hard drives and online storage, paper is simply a crutch to be finally snapped in favor of bits.
It looks like the New York Times is noticing. The article points out how a Google engineer has already eliminated paper from his family's life; I have been fighting this battle for nearly a decade. My weapons of choice? Visioneer's line of sheet-fed scanners and both CD burners as well as Moxy. I scan EVERYTHING: receipts, photos, notes, legal documents, even recipes, with just a flick of the wrist into the small slot behind my keyboard. In moments, the digital facsimile is written to my hard drive, for future archiving to CD and Moxy. PaperPort software not only scans a perfect copy, but also offers, if warranted, optical character recognition to make those static blocks of ink into digital, malleable, components. After the scan, straight to the shredder for erasure of identity theft risk.
Why do this, you ask? Many reasons. One, a catastrophic disaster. If your papers are stored in your house, what good will they do you in a fire? A fireproof safe? Uh, yeah, that's what you want to entrust your life to: a block of metal that you have now way of testing will survive, and your only recourse is a refund from the manufacturer? Oh, yes, IF you can find the receipt for it, that is.
Want more? Years ago, this country's revenue collection agency informed me they had doubts about my claims of income and expenses. They instructed me to provide proof. In one weekend, I was able to pull up every receipt, every pay stub, every scrap of evidence and set my printer a-churning to ship them undeniable evidence. In a week, the matter was amiably settled, thanks to my information.
I'm clearly not the only one here. Starbucks now asks if you want a receipt when you pay by card. Banks and credit card companies push the "benefits" of paperless statements (though, since it's a cost reduction for them, I think they might be better served by offering an incentive). I bought a house by doing a stock transaction via a cell phone's mobile data connection, and executed the paperwork all with a digital signature: not a single actual piece of paper until we refinanced.
The article points one one downside: power consumption. It fails to point out the other: paper is a renewable resource. The more we use, the more trees are planted, the more global warming is fought. Notice I didn't say recyclable; Penn & Teller made a very eloquent and thought provoking piece on why paper recycling is horrible for the environment, and greater paper use is actually a far better alternative. See for yourself (warning: language may be offensive, and it's 29 minutes long):
With the advent of the Kindle, Amazon is trying to produce a watershed digital moment for one of the biggest paper consumers: books and magazines. Direct marketing has already found e-mail far more effective than traditional mail. And note taking? Laptops and smartphones are already de rigueur in the classroom and boardroom, making those 8 1/2" x 11" pads look like a quaint relic. Our offices already make the offices of just 10 years ago look like they came from an episode of Mad Men.
It's time to free ourselves of the paper handcuffs. We no longer consider etching on a wax tablet, or chiseling out our thoughts in stone, or capturing a moment in oil and canvas. Let's throw off this last, pervasive vestige of our past and finally embrace the world of tomorrow, today.
I have an admission: I hate paper. From printouts of emails, to handwritten notes, I detest paper in almost all forms. It has become the trash and detritus of our daily life: credit/debit cards have nearly replaced paper money, but they leave behind the droppings of indecipherable receipts that we, as a society, are terrified to leave behind for fear that our entire identity will be stolen from that innocuous pizza payment. As we have moved to a digital world, complete with multifunction scanner/printers and both enormous hard drives and online storage, paper is simply a crutch to be finally snapped in favor of bits.It looks like the New York Times is noticing. The article points out how a Google engineer has already eliminated paper from his family's life; I have been fighting this battle for nearly a decade. My weapons of choice? Visioneer's line of sheet-fed scanners and both CD burners as well as Moxy. I scan EVERYTHING: receipts, photos, notes, legal documents, even recipes, with just a flick of the wrist into the small slot behind my keyboard. In moments, the digital facsimile is written to my hard drive, for future archiving to CD and Moxy. PaperPort software not only scans a perfect copy, but also offers, if warranted, optical character recognition to make those static blocks of ink into digital, malleable, components. After the scan, straight to the shredder for erasure of identity theft risk.
Why do this, you ask? Many reasons. One, a catastrophic disaster. If your papers are stored in your house, what good will they do you in a fire? A fireproof safe? Uh, yeah, that's what you want to entrust your life to: a block of metal that you have now way of testing will survive, and your only recourse is a refund from the manufacturer? Oh, yes, IF you can find the receipt for it, that is.
Want more? Years ago, this country's revenue collection agency informed me they had doubts about my claims of income and expenses. They instructed me to provide proof. In one weekend, I was able to pull up every receipt, every pay stub, every scrap of evidence and set my printer a-churning to ship them undeniable evidence. In a week, the matter was amiably settled, thanks to my information.
I'm clearly not the only one here. Starbucks now asks if you want a receipt when you pay by card. Banks and credit card companies push the "benefits" of paperless statements (though, since it's a cost reduction for them, I think they might be better served by offering an incentive). I bought a house by doing a stock transaction via a cell phone's mobile data connection, and executed the paperwork all with a digital signature: not a single actual piece of paper until we refinanced.
The article points one one downside: power consumption. It fails to point out the other: paper is a renewable resource. The more we use, the more trees are planted, the more global warming is fought. Notice I didn't say recyclable; Penn & Teller made a very eloquent and thought provoking piece on why paper recycling is horrible for the environment, and greater paper use is actually a far better alternative. See for yourself (warning: language may be offensive, and it's 29 minutes long):
With the advent of the Kindle, Amazon is trying to produce a watershed digital moment for one of the biggest paper consumers: books and magazines. Direct marketing has already found e-mail far more effective than traditional mail. And note taking? Laptops and smartphones are already de rigueur in the classroom and boardroom, making those 8 1/2" x 11" pads look like a quaint relic. Our offices already make the offices of just 10 years ago look like they came from an episode of Mad Men.
It's time to free ourselves of the paper handcuffs. We no longer consider etching on a wax tablet, or chiseling out our thoughts in stone, or capturing a moment in oil and canvas. Let's throw off this last, pervasive vestige of our past and finally embrace the world of tomorrow, today.
Labels: bullshit, Eco-friendly, lifehacks
Friday, December 07, 2007
Dog emails dog
Brian, as they say, be careful what you wish for.
Who is Brian? Brian is an intern at Box.net. Not familiar with them? They are an online storage company: a virtual drive, if you will. My Netvibes membership introduced them to me. I rarely use them, but thought they were generally fine for a free storage service.
Then Brian contacted me.
See, Brian noticed I was blogging about Picnik, a great photo editing tool for free online. Brian, out of the goodness of his heart, thought I might like to know about Box.net's service to do the same; he even took the time to email my Gmail account to tell me.
Gosh, that Brian. Such a nice, helpful guy. Yep, I might have fallen for this "aw, shucks" approach...had he not included the URL I boldfaced above. See, it's clear from the appending of "picnik" on the URL that Box.net is trolling for Picnik users to switch, and Box.net is using this as a crude viral campaign to go after a competitor.
As it is, Brian, I'll thank you for the helpful hint, and suggest that you switch to a less crude approach in the future, perhaps tagging links with a URL tracker that you build, for instance, or an affiliate network? Brian, you may be a very nice guy, and, as you claim to be just an intern, maybe you didn't know that this approach might be interpreted as ham-handed, so I'll give you the benefit of the doubt, and I'll suggest that you let your bosses know that they probably need to be a bit more subtle in their efforts to build awareness for a new product.
Thanks, but no thanks.
Brian, as they say, be careful what you wish for.Who is Brian? Brian is an intern at Box.net. Not familiar with them? They are an online storage company: a virtual drive, if you will. My Netvibes membership introduced them to me. I rarely use them, but thought they were generally fine for a free storage service.
Then Brian contacted me.
See, Brian noticed I was blogging about Picnik, a great photo editing tool for free online. Brian, out of the goodness of his heart, thought I might like to know about Box.net's service to do the same; he even took the time to email my Gmail account to tell me.
Hello,
My name is Brian, I'm an intern working at Box.net. I saw your post about editing photos online and I wanted to write to you in case you would be interested in knowing Box.net now lets users edit photos online as well.
Using our OpenBox platform, users can now right-click on any image and edit it instantly, for free. OpenBox is a platform which lets developers write software that can be installed directly on the Box.net website.
If you decide you would like to post something about this on your blog, please let me know if you or your readers have any suggestions for the service.
For some more information:
http://www.box.net/services/picnik
Sincerely,
Brian
Box.net
Gosh, that Brian. Such a nice, helpful guy. Yep, I might have fallen for this "aw, shucks" approach...had he not included the URL I boldfaced above. See, it's clear from the appending of "picnik" on the URL that Box.net is trolling for Picnik users to switch, and Box.net is using this as a crude viral campaign to go after a competitor.
As it is, Brian, I'll thank you for the helpful hint, and suggest that you switch to a less crude approach in the future, perhaps tagging links with a URL tracker that you build, for instance, or an affiliate network? Brian, you may be a very nice guy, and, as you claim to be just an intern, maybe you didn't know that this approach might be interpreted as ham-handed, so I'll give you the benefit of the doubt, and I'll suggest that you let your bosses know that they probably need to be a bit more subtle in their efforts to build awareness for a new product.
Thanks, but no thanks.
Monday, September 03, 2007
The United States of Circuit City
"Papers, please." Sounds like a line out of a Nazi guard in an old war movie, right? Wrong. These were words (paraphrased) uttered in Brooklyn, Ohio, this very weekend by not just one ill informed individual, but two. Unfortunately, one was a Circuit City store manager and one, unbelievably, was a police officer.
If you've ever bought something from a large electronics store, you've always accepted the annoyance of having to show your receipt and have your package inspected as you leave. What you might not have expected are the consequences for not doing so. Worse, you probably don't know your rights in this regard. This man did, and exercised them both this weekend. His reward? Arrested on trumped up charges. You can't believe this until you read it.
By the way, Circuit City is not the only one who has gotten out of control with this. Similar stories of multiple Best Buy's are far too common. As a former electronics retail store manager, I can honestly say that there is a line where common sense is a requirement of your job. If you don't feel so, you've crossed that line. In this story, the hapless Circuit City store manager is about to find out what happens when that line gets crossed.
"Papers, please." Sounds like a line out of a Nazi guard in an old war movie, right? Wrong. These were words (paraphrased) uttered in Brooklyn, Ohio, this very weekend by not just one ill informed individual, but two. Unfortunately, one was a Circuit City store manager and one, unbelievably, was a police officer.If you've ever bought something from a large electronics store, you've always accepted the annoyance of having to show your receipt and have your package inspected as you leave. What you might not have expected are the consequences for not doing so. Worse, you probably don't know your rights in this regard. This man did, and exercised them both this weekend. His reward? Arrested on trumped up charges. You can't believe this until you read it.
By the way, Circuit City is not the only one who has gotten out of control with this. Similar stories of multiple Best Buy's are far too common. As a former electronics retail store manager, I can honestly say that there is a line where common sense is a requirement of your job. If you don't feel so, you've crossed that line. In this story, the hapless Circuit City store manager is about to find out what happens when that line gets crossed.
Saturday, August 04, 2007
24 hours of Travel = endless stories.
Random thoughts from a recent whirlwind business trip to Cincinnati (24 hours; 12 of it on a plane):
United's 777's are huge. With a 2-5-2 seating configuration and three separate sections in Economy, each the size of a normal 737, this thing packs them in. However, it is easily one of the most poorly designed planes I have ever been on:
- The seats in Economy are so tightly packed, it's insulting. Especially when you compare to JetBlue or even Southwest.
- Why don't people ever learn that design and compromise almost never go well together (Ayn Rand taught us this, folks.) For instance, who's the brain surgeon who said "we want a multimedia system at every seat in Economy" and then followed it up with putting a metal case the size of a desktop PC under every seat? This lovely setup gives you a choice: a place to put your bag, or a place to put your feet. Nope, you can't do both. Outstanding.
- Those first class "pods" are truly something special. One button, and your seat becomes a bed, complete with white noise on the built in entertainment system and a desk with a charger for the laptop. As you drift off to sleep, a massage lulls you. United missed the boat: they need to sell these suckers in Hammacher Schlemmer for the home.
- I get the plane is huge. Any reason United doesn’t seem to? They put the thing at the smallest gate in the terminal in both San Francisco and Chicago, ensuring that there is absolutely no way to load the craft in anything approaching an efficient fashion. Yep, nothing like a half hour in the boarding chute to make you love those frequent flyer miles.
- Kudos to United for their onboard mapping application. Us seasoned travelers dig it, but I always wondered why everyone was still using MapQuest's maps from 1999 (that wonderful copyright is omnipresent in most systems). United's also gives you periodic updates on airspeed, time left, and time at the local destination. And the one-touch map button on the control arm is a godsend. Psst...hook up with Google Earth next time and put that screen to work!
United also seems to have taken inefficiency to a new surreal level:
- On boarding the last leg of my trip, we were cheerily informed that, while we were absolutely certain to be late in departing (partially due to said cattle chute), we would still arrive on time because the original planned departure time was cleverly calculated in advance to be early. WHAT???
- Stuck in the boarding tube from hell, a harried flight attendant burst through the throngs, announcing to any and all that the plane had no power. Oh, and had anyone seen any pilots in the crowd? I kid you not.
- Remember how big those 777's are? Amazing that on not just one 777 flight, but two, they were BOTH overbooked. Luckily, you could get a free RT ticket for giving up your precious overheated, no-place-to-put-your feet seat for a flight the next morning. Um…we have computers now, folks: isn't air travel advanced enough not to have to ask Las Vegas to lay odds for them on successfully getting X asses into X seats?
Other surreal moments:
- Blearily stumbling through O'Hare at 5:30 AM to make a connecting flight (on the other side of the country's busiest airport, of course) and almost bowling over…Al Sharpton. Yep, can't make this stuff up.
- Boarding my first United Express jet…and noticing it's just like a real plane, but everything is perfectly scaled down by 1/3. Headroom? 1/3 less. Aisle width? Yep. Overheads? You bet: 1/3 scale. In flight magazine? 1/3 less pages. But nothing capped the drink cart: you haven't lived until you've seen one of these in action. This plane instantly makes you feel like you've accidentally grown to 9 feet tall.
- Landing in Dayton, Ohio, and immediately heading for the nearest cup of coffee…at something called Boston Stoker? And, at 7:30 AM, a place called Boston Stoker Coffee, proudly proclaimed as Dayton's best coffee, located at the airport, with no other coffee choices…hadn't brewed any coffee yet. Oh, the joy of the slower pace of the Midwest.
- Going to the rental car location, we exited the Dayton airport…into a cornfield. In fact, the entire airport is essentially carved out of a cornfield. Field of Dreams? Luckily, the car rental was only 120 ears away.
- I'm sure there's a perfectly good reason for it, but something called Fifth Third Bank seems like a bad place to put my money. They don't seem to have a head for figures.
- You ever notice on some longer flights that the flight attendant will, later on, bring a bottle of water and cups through the cabin for any thirsty folks? On the flight to SFO, United's flight attendant randomly decided white wine would be much better instead. I figured she was either trying to finish a bottle from Business class or just had lost her mind. Luckily, it was the latter: she finished off the bottle, and immediately headed for the galley for a new one, and resumed pouring for us stunned Economy passengers. Think this only happens on flights to Wine Country?
- Kevin Smith waxes poetic about Tim Horton's, so I had to stop and pop the pastry. Sorry, Sir: Dunkies has it beat cold. Hell, even lowly Happy Donuts in San Francisco could top those poor excuses for fine carb laden cuisine.
- What seems like a good time saver but really turned out to be a bad idea: bringing a new men's shirt, still in the plastic, for the morning airport men's room stall quick change. Even the vast expanse of the sole handicapped commode could not overcome the sheer torture of trying to undo the mixture of origami and camouflaged pin inserting that men's shirts are plagued with. And someone PLEASE explain why there is an entire forest of cardboard in there with it???
- GPS is simply a godsend for business travel: hit the address, and start driving. That's it. Reminds me of when I first started to use Google: why would I ever need to clutter my brain up with useless information again? TomTom, I salute you.
And finally,
- SFO: great idea, letting you insert your credit card when you enter the garage instead of having to get a ticket. Um…maybe you want to close the loop by putting a checkout lane I can just insert my card and get the receipt, WITHOUT the forlorn cashier sitting next to me, watching me take away his job, one slip at a time? Two words: Unmanned lanes.
Glad to be back. Next week, I get to do it all again!
United's 777's are huge. With a 2-5-2 seating configuration and three separate sections in Economy, each the size of a normal 737, this thing packs them in. However, it is easily one of the most poorly designed planes I have ever been on:- The seats in Economy are so tightly packed, it's insulting. Especially when you compare to JetBlue or even Southwest.
- Why don't people ever learn that design and compromise almost never go well together (Ayn Rand taught us this, folks.) For instance, who's the brain surgeon who said "we want a multimedia system at every seat in Economy" and then followed it up with putting a metal case the size of a desktop PC under every seat? This lovely setup gives you a choice: a place to put your bag, or a place to put your feet. Nope, you can't do both. Outstanding.
- Those first class "pods" are truly something special. One button, and your seat becomes a bed, complete with white noise on the built in entertainment system and a desk with a charger for the laptop. As you drift off to sleep, a massage lulls you. United missed the boat: they need to sell these suckers in Hammacher Schlemmer for the home.- I get the plane is huge. Any reason United doesn’t seem to? They put the thing at the smallest gate in the terminal in both San Francisco and Chicago, ensuring that there is absolutely no way to load the craft in anything approaching an efficient fashion. Yep, nothing like a half hour in the boarding chute to make you love those frequent flyer miles.
- Kudos to United for their onboard mapping application. Us seasoned travelers dig it, but I always wondered why everyone was still using MapQuest's maps from 1999 (that wonderful copyright is omnipresent in most systems). United's also gives you periodic updates on airspeed, time left, and time at the local destination. And the one-touch map button on the control arm is a godsend. Psst...hook up with Google Earth next time and put that screen to work!
United also seems to have taken inefficiency to a new surreal level:
- On boarding the last leg of my trip, we were cheerily informed that, while we were absolutely certain to be late in departing (partially due to said cattle chute), we would still arrive on time because the original planned departure time was cleverly calculated in advance to be early. WHAT???
- Stuck in the boarding tube from hell, a harried flight attendant burst through the throngs, announcing to any and all that the plane had no power. Oh, and had anyone seen any pilots in the crowd? I kid you not.
- Remember how big those 777's are? Amazing that on not just one 777 flight, but two, they were BOTH overbooked. Luckily, you could get a free RT ticket for giving up your precious overheated, no-place-to-put-your feet seat for a flight the next morning. Um…we have computers now, folks: isn't air travel advanced enough not to have to ask Las Vegas to lay odds for them on successfully getting X asses into X seats?
Other surreal moments:
- Blearily stumbling through O'Hare at 5:30 AM to make a connecting flight (on the other side of the country's busiest airport, of course) and almost bowling over…Al Sharpton. Yep, can't make this stuff up.- Boarding my first United Express jet…and noticing it's just like a real plane, but everything is perfectly scaled down by 1/3. Headroom? 1/3 less. Aisle width? Yep. Overheads? You bet: 1/3 scale. In flight magazine? 1/3 less pages. But nothing capped the drink cart: you haven't lived until you've seen one of these in action. This plane instantly makes you feel like you've accidentally grown to 9 feet tall.
- Landing in Dayton, Ohio, and immediately heading for the nearest cup of coffee…at something called Boston Stoker? And, at 7:30 AM, a place called Boston Stoker Coffee, proudly proclaimed as Dayton's best coffee, located at the airport, with no other coffee choices…hadn't brewed any coffee yet. Oh, the joy of the slower pace of the Midwest.
- Going to the rental car location, we exited the Dayton airport…into a cornfield. In fact, the entire airport is essentially carved out of a cornfield. Field of Dreams? Luckily, the car rental was only 120 ears away.
- I'm sure there's a perfectly good reason for it, but something called Fifth Third Bank seems like a bad place to put my money. They don't seem to have a head for figures.- You ever notice on some longer flights that the flight attendant will, later on, bring a bottle of water and cups through the cabin for any thirsty folks? On the flight to SFO, United's flight attendant randomly decided white wine would be much better instead. I figured she was either trying to finish a bottle from Business class or just had lost her mind. Luckily, it was the latter: she finished off the bottle, and immediately headed for the galley for a new one, and resumed pouring for us stunned Economy passengers. Think this only happens on flights to Wine Country?
- Kevin Smith waxes poetic about Tim Horton's, so I had to stop and pop the pastry. Sorry, Sir: Dunkies has it beat cold. Hell, even lowly Happy Donuts in San Francisco could top those poor excuses for fine carb laden cuisine. - What seems like a good time saver but really turned out to be a bad idea: bringing a new men's shirt, still in the plastic, for the morning airport men's room stall quick change. Even the vast expanse of the sole handicapped commode could not overcome the sheer torture of trying to undo the mixture of origami and camouflaged pin inserting that men's shirts are plagued with. And someone PLEASE explain why there is an entire forest of cardboard in there with it???
- GPS is simply a godsend for business travel: hit the address, and start driving. That's it. Reminds me of when I first started to use Google: why would I ever need to clutter my brain up with useless information again? TomTom, I salute you.
And finally,
- SFO: great idea, letting you insert your credit card when you enter the garage instead of having to get a ticket. Um…maybe you want to close the loop by putting a checkout lane I can just insert my card and get the receipt, WITHOUT the forlorn cashier sitting next to me, watching me take away his job, one slip at a time? Two words: Unmanned lanes.
Glad to be back. Next week, I get to do it all again!
Labels: bullshit, GPS, Kevin Smith, travel
Monday, May 28, 2007
Which kills more birds: Wind Turbines or Cats?
As a resident of a fairly windy area, I am always amazed at the level of resistance people offer to wind power. It's free, sustainable, clean, and cheap. There are usually two reasons that anyone actually offers against wind power. The first is noise (from the spinning turbine blades); that one is solved with moving the turbines to remote locations, like unpopulated hillsides or offshore. The second is the one that gets most people up in arms: birds cannot see the spinning blades, and are cut to pieces. This leaves most environmentalists at odds with their bleeding hearts, as clean power that is borne on the back of dead avians seems to be a real gut wrencher.
Luckily, along has come this article, which correctly points out that the United States' incredibly large feral cat problem easily eclipses the amount of bird deaths caused by wind power. Windmills? An estimated 40,000 birds each year meet their ends from these power producers. Feral cats? "Hundreds of millions" of birds killed every year. That means, annually, wind turbines kill less than 0.01% than feral cats. Let's say we double the amount of wind turbines in this country; cats would still kill over a million more birds a day than all the windmills in the country.
Now, no one seems to be advocating the death of all of these felines, and they don't even produce power. Sure, they are full of personality and provide excellent greeting cards, but let's dispel this bird-killing myth of wind turbines once and for all, and start harvesting one of our last natural resources, before it's too late.
As a resident of a fairly windy area, I am always amazed at the level of resistance people offer to wind power. It's free, sustainable, clean, and cheap. There are usually two reasons that anyone actually offers against wind power. The first is noise (from the spinning turbine blades); that one is solved with moving the turbines to remote locations, like unpopulated hillsides or offshore. The second is the one that gets most people up in arms: birds cannot see the spinning blades, and are cut to pieces. This leaves most environmentalists at odds with their bleeding hearts, as clean power that is borne on the back of dead avians seems to be a real gut wrencher.Luckily, along has come this article, which correctly points out that the United States' incredibly large feral cat problem easily eclipses the amount of bird deaths caused by wind power. Windmills? An estimated 40,000 birds each year meet their ends from these power producers. Feral cats? "Hundreds of millions" of birds killed every year. That means, annually, wind turbines kill less than 0.01% than feral cats. Let's say we double the amount of wind turbines in this country; cats would still kill over a million more birds a day than all the windmills in the country.
Now, no one seems to be advocating the death of all of these felines, and they don't even produce power. Sure, they are full of personality and provide excellent greeting cards, but let's dispel this bird-killing myth of wind turbines once and for all, and start harvesting one of our last natural resources, before it's too late.
Labels: bullshit, Eco-friendly
Saturday, January 13, 2007
$1 Million says there are no psychics
It was 1981. That's Incredible ruled the TV landscape. On came a man who could move the pages of a phone book with his mind, complete with yoga suit. "That's incredible!" Fran Tarkenton cried out.
Then, from backstage, out walked a man who looked like a cross between Santa Claus and a professor. He was introduced as James Randi, a professional debunker. He went by his stage name of "The Amazing Randi," and claimed he could duplicate any so-called psychic tricks with standard cons used by magicians. Even more, he said he could smoke out these people as charlatans, and proceeded to do so, live, to the "psychic". I would never take things at face value again.
Over 20 years later, and I am still a skeptic, thanks to James Randi. And so is he: he is offering $1 Million to the high profile Psychics to just agree to be tested for their feats scientifically. He's spent years offering the prize to anyone, but the kooks come out. Now, let's see John Edwards or the like explain why they won't pick up a $ 1 million check.
Keep the strength up, Randi.
Then, from backstage, out walked a man who looked like a cross between Santa Claus and a professor. He was introduced as James Randi, a professional debunker. He went by his stage name of "The Amazing Randi," and claimed he could duplicate any so-called psychic tricks with standard cons used by magicians. Even more, he said he could smoke out these people as charlatans, and proceeded to do so, live, to the "psychic". I would never take things at face value again.
Over 20 years later, and I am still a skeptic, thanks to James Randi. And so is he: he is offering $1 Million to the high profile Psychics to just agree to be tested for their feats scientifically. He's spent years offering the prize to anyone, but the kooks come out. Now, let's see John Edwards or the like explain why they won't pick up a $ 1 million check.Keep the strength up, Randi.
